It’s largely Sarcasm. And by large, I mean lots. Like, most, if not all of it. It’s gonna be sarcasm.

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Joined 1 year ago
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Cake day: July 29th, 2023

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  • my youngest brother had a lazy stick. It was a broom handle and a ruler taped together with a couple of chop sticks mixed in to help hold the two together. To avoid getting out of bed, he fashioned this up to turn off the lights in his room. Inspired by Homers broom in the episode of the Simpsons where he gains a ton of weight to go on disability.

    This stick did the trick and even could turn the tv on and off.

    Twenty years later, my brother is currently on a diet and losing a lot of weight. All the weight is post stick and much later in life, but we have a laugh about it every now and again.



  • Even while having a car, I found my self taking transit anyways. To the point where both my daughters (15 and 17) have absolutely no desire to get a car or their drivers because not only do they see what’s happening to the climate, but know transit well enough that vehicles are next to pointless for them. My understanding is that many, not all, of their friends thing the same way, too.

    That, and I don’t care if you drive a BMW. My ride costs 150k, and comes with a driver who opens the door for me. Fuck cars and the status that goes with 'em, too.



  • I’d outlaw drive through.

    No longer will that fucking line up for coffee reach down the road and over the horizon in the morning. The sitting there for twenty minutes, idling your car as you watch the person in front of you park in the middle of the intersection like an asshole. No.

    Go, park, use the magic of being a biped.

    Now there’s no excuse. You either drink the coffee at work, or face that Starbucks barista you know secretly hates you. Biped your way in the door, get your morning fix with confidence because fuck mark, no barista is going to ruin your day.

    Not while I’m there banning drive throughs to ruin it for you.

    Edit: Barista. I don’t even know what a batista is but could potentially be a bad ass.








  • Twice. I am not a healthy human so I try and play on the cleaner side of life because getting sick is kinda easy and sucks a little extra like that.

    Environmental guilt keeps them at seven minutes each average (yeah, I timed them. I don’t even remember why, but that guilt seems viable enough)

    Occasionally when the youtube hits just right the night time shower can be 15 minutes. Or it is complex grooming day and not just a shave or something.