Matches Pickled Pete’s bloodshot eyes

I managed a Cody whom I called Codeine because he was a such a dope. 30ish, sold himself as a technician. In a car shop, pulled a ceiling mounted air hose over the left front fender to fill the rear tire, scratched the paint badly from the gritty hose. Left the bosses rolling stool under the alignment lift and heard plywood cracking as he lowered it, didn’t bother stopping until it was flat. Found out a week later he left the tierod nuts loose after adjustment. Left a flathead screwdriver in his back pocket and popped a hole in the customer seat. Worked one full day, sent home at lunch the next day with a full days pay, worth the price to get rid of him.

Can I replace Windows with SteamOS directly yet? -Basic Win11 user who is getting sick of Win11. Get off my WinXpLawn

Did you know the Ancient Greeks invented anal sex? It only took 200 years before the Romans decided they should try it with women.

Guess who’s not going to that cops house when the 911 fire call comes in?

“I bet you can’t even en passant you loser” - Chess Gang

Wanna know what I don’t have an extra $50 bucks for lately?

Open season on the tasty meat creatures

It’s one of those “shithole” states he doesn’t acknowledge

Florida has a checkpoint for plants and possible invasive species, definitely not for firetrucks helping people though.

“Have you ever tried simply turning off the TV, sitting down with your children, and hitting them?”.

-Bender Rodriguez

Also “Not gonna lie…” to start a sentence. Well thank you for that decency?

Drop leaflets to them which say “surrender and we won’t send you back to NK”, simple.

Can’t pay our teachers above poverty level, but here’s billions for war any time.

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Busy touching it’s forehead to the ground five times a day instead of progressing it’s culture or human’s rights in any way.

They cannot engineer a stop to the cracking and the leak, only replace the injectors all with new parts, which would cause a backorder millions deep. So the shitty company is saying “the shitty car leaks fuel and we can’t fix it so we made a funnel for gas so you can’t notice if it happens. Also it may be more fire resistant? Good luck!”

I’m not sure where to find the bow on an airplane? Is it near the aileron or the conflabulator?

Rent plus a middle finger?

Jaywalking? Fuckin life with no parole.