My view in Arctic for your consideration :)

May I plug my community? !The_Heinlein_Society@lemmy.world would love more conversation. No current politics allowed :)

If she’s been like this before she underwent all this, then she was already treating you very badly and recent events only made it worse. I’m not any kind of doctor so I won’t throw around diagnoses, but I recognize these behaviors from other people describing what they’ve experienced from people who were emotionally and physically abusing them. I’ve also experienced some myself from being emotionally abused and neglected.

This sounds like abuse to me. You are being abused and manipulated maliciously and therapy can help you get through this. I was diagnosed with cPTSD, complex post traumatic stress disorder, which is PTSD that happens after long term trauma (especially in childhood, which is mine). Years with an abusive partner could definitely affect you this way.

You deserve a life of happiness. The sooner you get into therapy, the sooner you can get to happiness, or at least away from abuse. You are not going to change her.

Not who you’re replying to, but definitely. I manage several Instagram accounts that aren’t my personal accounts and the algorithm feeds me things I’d expect in my personal while I’m in one of the others. One of them I’m only logged into so it’s not as much, but the other is attached to me more because I created it, I guess, and even though I’ve curated a much different following list, and do entirely different things on that account, it still shows me more personal things.

I went through menopause just a few years ago. It threw everything into an upheaval. Thank goodness I didn’t have a partner to be like this to, but therapy definitely helped. She is absolutely going through a lot, physically and mentally, and will be for years. I still have hot flash episodes for weeks at a time and it’s always different.

Your feelings are valid. You have every right to them. Just because someone is going through chemical changes in their body doesn’t mean they can abuse you like this. Telling you that you have no right to your feelings is emotional abuse and she has no right to do that to you. You both need help to get through this, whether separate or together, but this is all new and for you to be told to sit down and shut up is just heartbreaking. Everything happening to her is also happening to you because it seems to me that she’s taking it all out on you and yeah, that affects you.

You are not dumb or stupid. You are caring and sympathetic to what she’s going through, and she reacts to this with hostility and arrogance. I can’t imagine anyone is obligated to put up with that from anyone, for any reason. It might change in time, but not if she never acknowledges the validity of your feelings and your right to have them.

I’m so sorry this is happening to you.

This is a great one: https://youtu.be/hLHi3wiSuWc?si=jIksepNQ6Wh-OZHe

Add It Up by the Violent Femmes

You seem to be saying that you don’t believe anyone saw it? I’m telling you how crowded it is around the pentagon at the time the plane hit. Late morning rush hour at that spot is packed with cars, and the area is surrounded by mid-rise offices and apartments. It’s impossible that nobody saw it happen. Yeah, I can say I know a guy, but he was traumatized by what he saw. I worked in Crystal City at the time, that day was hell. Just getting out of there took over four hours.

Don’t you think there would have been a lot of pushback from witnesses if the government actually said it wasn’t a plane? Don’t you think there would be actual witnesses coming forward to say that it wasn’t a plane if it really wasn’t? And where did the people on the plane who were killed go? They just disappear?

You assuming there was a mountain of video evidence. Not my word, all those people who saw it happen.

My boss, along with thousands of other people, was in his car commuting between VA and DC on the 14th street bridge. The plane went right over that bridge to crash into the pentagon. Thousands of cars on the surface streets around the pentagon. Thousands of people in the mid-rise buildings in Crystal City and surrounding areas saw the plane. Everyone driving that morning saw the plane. You cannot discount a plane when so many actually saw it, just because you didn’t.

I have only just now gotten the notification for your response. I have to think that’s our answer.

There are three posts I made, maybe it’s not federating? I’m not sure how all that works across instances.

Aw, thanks :)

Awesome, glad to see you here!

I came here from being pretty heavily involved in Reddit. The only thing keeping me there is r/heinlein, I want to keep it going.

You probably know most of us on the society’s board from back then. The Heinlein Forum has many of us, and I even have a little group for those of us who were afh friends back then. If you’re on facebook leave a comment on a post on the Heinlein Society’s page mentioning this and I’ll find you. (Most recent post is better)

lol no, but I do know the name. My username is the same it’s been since alt.fan.heinlein if you remember that. :)

Bullet in a Bible, Green Day

I bit the bullet in 2017 and got a Stearns and Foster mattress set. I think it was less than $2k for the set, queen size, at City Mattress, and they had a “zero percent interest for a year” thing going on. It’s one of the best purchases I’ve ever made.

You’ll find them for much higher prices online, it was going to the store that got me the deal. Find a mattress store near you that carries that brand and you may find a deal, too. It’ll save your back and you’ll sleep so much better.

I agree with you about TNG and DS9 completely. SNW is the best music since the earlier movies, IMO. I love it.